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Would You Let Your Teen-Ager Have Sex in Your House?

A friendly barbecue raises a few eyebrows when two moms face off about sex.

At a recent neighborhood get-together, two moms butted heads about the "appropriate" way to handle sexually active teens.

One mom knew her 17-year-old son was having sex with a girl he'd been dating for seven months. She believed it was best to be open and non-judgmental, provide condoms and allow them privacy in her son's basement bedroom. As she said, "I'd rather have them be in a safe place rather than hiding out somewhere."

I had to wonder if the girl's parents were privy to this arrangement.

The other lady, mother to two tween girls, was in disbelief. While she had not yet experienced the other mom's situation, she was pretty certain there would be no permissible sex under her roof. According to this mom, she believed in frank conversation and had spoken openly, and would continue to do so, about sex with both of her girls.   

The mother of the teenage boy became defensive and suggested that the other mom needed a reality check because "kids would find a way to do it no matter what."

And while that may be the case, there's something creepy about permitting your child to have sex somewhere in your home.

Would you give the go-ahead to your teen? Why or why not?    

frank July 25, 2012 at 03:40 PM
Fifteen months or so and this comment is getting a revival here on the Patch. The dippy mother who wrote it should respond and let us know how things are going. Maybe she's called grandma now. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>..
ME July 25, 2012 at 09:36 PM
Right on Frank! So, lady, where are you now? I'm sure you are getting these threads. Are you a grandma now or have you rethought the whole situation and became a responsible parent???? Please comment for us!!!
frank April 27, 2013 at 12:57 PM
Well, they don't have George's comment posted, but I still stand by my views of almost two years ago. George and the person who started this discussion deserve each other. I'm sure they could help raise a litter. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Cindey May 02, 2013 at 05:24 AM
Cindey - Now that I am older I look back at the parents of boys I dated that just "let the door be shut". Really, I think they were motivated by fear of confrontation, not knowing how to handle it or just plain not taking responsibility. It is loving to tell a young person the truth...no matter what they will think. I did not have a mother and my father was overloaded with raising 7 kids himself. It would have been so much better for me if one of those mothers of those guys I dated cared enough to tell me the truth...and also their sons. I am not proud of those days. Lust leads to passions and I know passion is hard to stop once it is going. But, just one person saying something like "care about yourself more than that...because you are precious" can change someone's life.
Cindey May 02, 2013 at 05:45 AM
Thinking more about my past...I had a friend, a teen girl, whose parents were very liberal and allowed their girls to freely sleep with their boyfriends at their home. I never liked being there. It was not secure. Even though I lived in a violent home and was not personally making good choices in life, I even felt it wasn't good! There is an order with parents...they should know better than the teens. When it is out of order, kids know it.

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